Anyone can be a father, but it takes a truly special man to be a Dad. The indelible legacies of Daddy are like words on marble and must be consciously and intentionally internalized and documented properly. This is for younger generations to read and learn from a true legend whose life is a compendium of templates that anyone can emulate in building a truly godly and lovely family. Here are 10 out of many of the legacies of my beloved Daddy, Mr. Kola Oluyemi Oguntibeju, a.k.a Loving Kolington:
A LEGACY OF PRAYER
He ensured that he gathered his household daily, morning and night, to pray together. This, he did consistently without failing till his last moments on earth. When going out, Daddy will pray; when he enters, he will stand by his table and pray before sitting down; when anyone is traveling, we pray; as we return, he will pray…“Bàbá mi ạ̀ti Ọlọrun mi …My father and my God” was how he loved to start praying. I have watched him prioritize talking to God in prayers since childhood. No wonder his last request from me has to do with prayers.
A LEGACY OF SONG
He had a good voice, and I believe singing runs in the family as well. He used songs for different purposes:Mercy- He had a consistent song before or after prayers to daily request for God’s mercies- Àanu rẹ olúwa lawá n tọrọ̀ rọ̀ ojo rẹ́ léwa, ẹ̀yẹ ti n fó, at’éra to n rinlẹ̀ yín ọ, lọ́pọ̀lọpọ̀… This means, “your mercy, Oh Lord, is what we ask for; rain it upon us, Oh Lord…”Love- He had song for teaching his children to love one another; he and mum sang for us consistently from childhood till we all became adults- Ọ́mọ́ ẹ̀yẹ ní ibugbè won kì n barawón ja, kí irẹ́pọ wà n’íle dára, ọmọ ìyá kì n ja. This means “children of birds in their small nest do not fight themselves. It is good for friendship to be in the home siblings should not fight.”Warning- He had another song to warn children of the future consequences of their actions. Ọ̀nẹ yá báfọ Jó gbà, tòrí tara ẹ̀, ọ̀nẹ̀ norí la ròrígho, ọ̀nẹ yábá fọ jo gbà tòrí tara ẹ̀. This means “whoever is trained and scolded and if he or she takes to correction, it is for his or her own good, whoever has brain should use it and think deeply that taking to correction is for your own good.”He also had special hymns that we sang consistently on our family prayer altar as though we were in church, such as ‘’wábá mi gbè alẹ́ fẹ́rẹ́ le tàn, òkuku sú ó̀luwa ba migbé, bí oluràn lọwọ́ míran bayẹ̀, ìranwọ́ alaìni wábá mi gbè ‘’. This means, “abide with me fast falls the even tide the darkness deepens Lord with me abide when all the help and comfort cease, help of the helpless lo abide with me.”I can go on and on, but…
A LEGACY OF THE WORD OF GOD
Dad loved the word of God and one of the ways I enjoyed his company was by gisting the scripture. I remember that he would always request that I buy him a bible with big letterings, Open Heavens’ devotionals, and a House Fellowship manual so that he could study the word. When he couldn’t read the bible by himself any longer, our family prayer time became longer as we read the bible and Open Heavens daily till he passed on to be with the Lord.
A LEGACY OF LOVE
He was a lover of people. No wonder his nickname was Loving Kolington! He loved our mother so much; he bought her a car when he could afford one, played Ludo and Whot with her, and corrected her in love by saying FEM FEM… she would laugh or smile, correction taken. I never saw him speak harshly to Mum or in a high tone. They had ways of managing their differences without the children noticing. The best gift a man can give the children is to love their mummy and give her peace. Everyone can learn from this! Dad loved all his children and gave us pet names: Queen A, Queen B, and Queen E. He loved his colleagues so much that more than 20 years after retirement, those who worked with him in the office still came looking for him and attended all his family events. He loved family and friends and accommodated everyone joyfully without complaints. He lived a life of love, so he left on the day of love on the 14th of February!
A LEGACY OF SOCIAL WORK
Daddy loved the people, and no matter the price of fuel in the country, he ensured that, for over 20 years, potable water was available to the people in the neighborhood. He would encourage us to pump water regularly for the community, a course he was committed to till the end. He was a giver; he paid not just his children’s school fees but for other children he could afford to help. Any child who lived under his roof must be educated
.A LEGACY OF NEATNESS
Long before COVID-19, if you knew Daddy, you would know neatness. Wash your hands regularly, rinse utensils thoroughly before use, clean the top of your soft drinks before drinking, and, of course, if your snacks drop, that’s the end.Why should your socks and shoes smell as a man when you can sun-dry them?
A LEGACY OF INTEGRITY AND ACCOUNTABILITY
Dad loved uprightness and accountability. He lived and taught this at home and in the office, and usually, he would tell us what happened in his office and how he handled different scenarios. He would say to us, “I don’t have high BP because no government resource is mixed with mine, and that’s why I can live the rest of my life in Akure without hiding or panicking.” Truly, God fought for him. He enjoyed his retirement benefits against all odds. He lived a life of godliness with contentment. Live a life of integrity and accountability, and enjoy your peace of mind!
A LEGACY OF EXCELLENCE AND COMMITMENT TO DUTIES
Dad lived a life of excellence and commitment in raising his children and managing his home, doing God’s work as a Sunday School teacher in RCCG, serving as a member of the church’s building committee, and discharging his official duties in the sports council, which took him to different countries within Africa, England, Australia, etc. Commitment and excellence also took him to the peak of his career with the help of God. Seeth thou a man diligent… proverbs 22:29.
A LEGACY OF HUMOUR AND GAME
He balanced discipline with humor; he played games and cracked jokes, and people could relax and be happy around him. He wasn’t the type of parent that would be at home, and people would sneak or hide around. Those who played Whot and Ludo with him during his lifetime will understand better. If you can play with your children when you are young and strong, they will stay and play with you when you are old and weak.
A LEGACY OF FAITH IN GOD NO MATTER WHAT LIFE THROWS
Dad kept the faith, and till the very end, he kept on requesting mercy and prayers, and that’s all that matters. The whole essence of life is to fear God and keep His commandments.
DAD LIVES ON!—
Bukola Oguntibeju,
Queen E (Daughter
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